In Germany, the small town of Essen hung their heads down low to mourn the loss of over twelve-hundred beers. A most vile gang of thieves broke into a liquor shop over the weekend and proceeded to enact one of the most disturbing crimes of the century. Instead of stealing the beer, they removed the caps from all twelve-hundred bottles of Koenig Pilsner and escaped into thin air leaving the beer to die a slow and painful death by the elements. The thieves stole the bottle caps because the company was running a contest where certain caps contained points that could be redeemed for a slew of prizes including home appliances, stereo equipment, and power tools. The thieves scoured the store in search of these prizes caps and and didn’t even have the common courtesy to drink any of the beer before escaping. The thieves are still on the loose and all remaining stock of Koenig Pilsner beer is under surveillance until these criminals have been brought to justice.
Quotes From The Mouth Of Madness
I don’t need to decorate with fake cobwebs, I’ve got the real thing.
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