In Colorado, a 29-year-old man faked his own stabbing because he didn’t feel like working his scheduled night shift at Blockbuster Video. The man crawled into work with multiple stab wounds to his legs and claimed that he had been attacked on his way to work by three skinheads dressed entirely in black. Unfortunately for the man, surveillance cameras from a nearby Target store show the man shopping in perfect health, disproving his earlier claim. When police confronted the man with this newly found evidence, he quickly recanted his story. The man confessed to stabbing himself multiple times so he wouldn’t have to go to work and was sent to jail, where he won’t have to worry about punching a time card.
Curtis Rx
Harken Strangers! So you’ve come here on this dark and stormy night to hear my dastardly little tale. Let me begin by saying, that no matter how shocking it may seem, every crimson ounce of it is true. I am an advocate of mischief and a creator of turmoil. I compose ghastly music based on eerie circumstance and delightful tragedy in the band Creature Feature and the band Rufus Rex. I direct strange films depicting ill-fated events and ghoulish irony. I am a writer of the macabre, as opposed to a revolver, I use a sharpened pencil to displace my brains. I gently squeeze the trigger and splatter the page with metaphor. Read, watch, and listen, you never know what wonderful terrible things you might unearth.
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10 Comments
And that–ladies and gentlemen, is insanity at its finest =D
oucth that insanity….. really. I hate work many… sometimes in my last work, I sleep on my chair ahahahaha
Of course it’s Target, right?
whatever happened to the good old days where you call in sick?
I don’t understand why he was sent to jail. Was he sent for stabbing himself? :/
If it was because he didn’t go to work, he could have just been fired.
Wow idiot, you just shanked yourself multiple times just for ONE day off
Seeing you post this in “Dumbass” has made my day! But I agree, this man is truely a dumbass…
wow. he couldn’t have simply called in sick??
This shows how pitifully stupid people are.
ummmm reminds me of an employee at some huge corporate company.
he crashes a meeting with the ceo stands on the table and starts sewing his lips together. no pain killers just needle and thread. that guy is a badass!