Villains & Vaudevillians

Put A Fork In Him, He’s Done!

curtisrx — Wed, 10 Mar 2010 20:11:15 +0000

In California, A man was attacked with a meat thermometer and stabbed in the neck while watching a movie at his local theater. During the screening, the man told a woman sitting near him to shut off her cell phone because she was talking loudly and disturbing the other moviegoers. The unidentified woman grew furious after the verbal exchange and quickly exited the movie theater with two men in tow. After a few minutes passed, one of the men returned and stabbed the victim in the neck with a meat thermometer. The man then attacked two other patrons who tried to intervene before fleeing the scene. The victim has been hospitalized and the suspects are still on the loose.

If A Tree Falls In The Forest, Can You Still Hear The Screams?

curtisrx — Mon, 01 Mar 2010 19:38:44 +0000

Hello Fiends,

Here is another excerpt from a little book of death poems I am writing called ‘101 Ways To Die, Accidents, Murders, And Other Techniques To Lose A Life’. I wrote this after I overheard one of my neighbors complaining about a tree that was hanging over into his yard and dropping leaves on his lawn. Enjoy!

If A Tree Falls In A Forest, Can You Still Hear The Screams?

The seasons are a changing
Shedding dead autumn leaves
They tumble through the air
On a mission to flee

You rake and you rake
But they just reappear
That damn neighbor’s tree
You tell him each year

Please cut it down
Or at least trim it back
But he blows you off
Then proceeds to laugh

As the wind picks up
It cuts through the air
Disturbs the silence
Then ruffles your hair

A toss of the rake
To let off some steam
First a snap, then a crack
Then a splitting of seams

A weight from above
Something has broken free
Crumpling your body
With a swift falling tree

The Season Finale Of Playing Dead Posted: That Girl’s a Reaper!

curtisrx — Sat, 27 Feb 2010 20:30:21 +0000

Hey fiends,

Just wanted to drop a line to let you know that the season finale of Playing Dead entitled ‘That Girl’s a Reaper’ has been posted. You can watch it directly below or click the banner to watch it on the official Playing Dead website:

Hope all is well,
~Curtis Rx

PS. If you liked what you saw, please leave a comment and help spread the word about this series.

Wait, Did You Mean My Left Or His?

curtisrx — Wed, 24 Feb 2010 20:12:31 +0000

In Peru, an 88-year-old man woke up from an emergency amputation only to discover that his healthy foot had been accidentally cut off instead of his damaged one. The man had gone into the hospital to treat an ulcer and when the infection began to spread, doctors had no choice but schedule an amputation for the infected foot. In an horrible turn of events, doctors severed the wrong foot instead and after they realized their unfortunate mistake, they had to move quickly to remove the damaged one to keep the infection from spreading further. The hospital learned of their mistake after the patient’s daughter lifted his sheets and discovered that they had removed the wrong foot. All doctors involved in the botched surgery have been put on indefinite suspension and a thorough investigation has been launched.

Here, Kitty Kitty!

curtisrx — Sun, 21 Feb 2010 22:49:11 +0000

In Rome, a 77-year-old well-known host of a popular Italian morning cooking show has been suspended after he told audiences on live television that he has eaten cat stew on a several different occasions—and loved it. Much to the shock of his 27-year-old female co-host, the man went on to say ‘Cat, soaked for three days in the running water of a stream comes out with its meat white and I assure you I have eaten it many times, that it is a delicacy’. Due the fact that Cats are protected by law in Italy and the taboo nature of his announcement, the television host has been put on indefinite suspension.

I’ve Got This Sharp Pain In My Stomach!

curtisrx — Sat, 20 Feb 2010 19:15:07 +0000

In Prague, a 66-year-old woman who lived with severe stomach pains for five long months finally discovered the source of her mysterious pain, a foot long surgical instrument lodged in her abdomen. The instrument was accidentally left inside her after an routine operation and when she told doctors that she was in constant pain, they accused her of being a hypochondriac and told her all they could do was prescribe pain killers. Whoever was in charge of the surgery’s paperwork and surgical tool list failed to document the missing instrument. The woman is now seeking compensation and claims that the hospital staff tried to cover up their medical malpractice.

Episode 7 Of Playing Dead Posted: The Totally Dead Show!

curtisrx — Fri, 19 Feb 2010 20:54:28 +0000

Hey fiends,

Just wanted to drop a line to let you know that Episode 7 of Playing Dead entitled ‘The Totally Dead Show’ has been posted. You can watch it directly below or click the banner to watch it on the official Playing Dead website:

Hope all is well,
~Curtis Rx

PS. If you liked what you saw, please leave a comment and help spread the word about this series.

And Then It All Blew Up In My Face, Literally!

curtisrx — Wed, 17 Feb 2010 00:10:56 +0000

In Indonesia, a 31-year-old man was riding across town on his motorcycle when the cigarette he was smoking exploded in his mouth. The blast caused six of his teeth to blow out and extensive damage to his lip that resulted in fifty one stitches. Authorities are still unsure of what actually caused the blast, but the remains of the cigarette were sent to a forensic laboratory for further testing. The man, who had been smoking since he was a schoolboy and had never had a single problem, has received compensation of $535 and the full cost of his medical bills. After the whole ordeal, he now vows to quit smoking for good.

Get Off My Lawn You Damn Kids!

curtisrx — Sat, 13 Feb 2010 19:31:23 +0000

In Russia, a 73-year-old man finally had enough of trespassers pillaging his garden in an attempt to to steal his precious potatoes and decided to take matters into his own hands. The man constructed three homemade tripwire landmines in his garage and planted them sporadically throughout the garden to ward off any unwanted visitors. Police learned off the explosives after an unlucky trespasser snuck into the garden and set of one of the crude landmines, injuring himself in the blast. The elderly man was convicted of unlawful construction of weapons and slapped with a 2 ½ year sentence.

Episode 6 Of Playing Dead Posted: You Oughta Be In Coffins!

curtisrx — Sat, 13 Feb 2010 19:08:47 +0000

Hey fiends,

Just wanted to drop a line to let you know that Episode 6 of Playing Dead entitled ‘You Oughta Be In Coffins’ has been posted. You can watch it directly below or click the banner to watch it on the official Playing Dead website:

Hope all is well,
~Curtis Rx

PS. If you liked what you saw, please leave a comment and help spread the word about this series.