Author Archives: curtisrx

Abracadabra Prison Sentence!

In Africa, a 35-year-old man will not pass go and will not collect $200 because he is going straight to jail for casting a spell on his neighbor. The man got into an argument with his next door neighbor, but instead of throwing punches, he decided to cast a spell on his opponent’s field to block rainfall, which would eventually lead to the crops shriveling up and dying. Witchcraft is no laughing matter in Africa, where the practice of it is punishable by a sentence of up to five years in prison. Prison may seem harsh to some, but it’s better than the alternative fate which has befallen some practitioners of the dark arts before the law could intervene, death at the hands of an angry mob. Authorities said that the man was given the stiff sentence to allow the community to enjoy peace in his absence and for his own safety against the roving mobs.

Posted in Weird News | Tagged , , , , | 2 Comments

Behold The Glory Of The Walking Dead!

Hey fiends,

I’ve pretty much given up on zombie films in the last few years, but finally there is a glimmer of hope on the horizon with Frank Darabont’s ‘The Walking Dead’. The hour-and-a-half premiere episode airs at 10pm on Halloween night. Check out the trailer below and keep a eye open for the skeletal female zombie wallowing around on the grass, definitely the best practical zombie makeup in years.

What did you guys think, could we finally have some decent zombie action shambling down the turnpike in search of fresh meat?

Stay weird,
~Curtis Rx

Posted in Blog | Tagged , , , , , , | 10 Comments

New Villains And Vaudevillians Shirt: COOK BACON, NOT METH!

Hello fiends,

I’m pleased to announce that the second strange entry in my line of Villains And Vaudevillians t-shirts has been released and it’s called “Cook Bacon Not Meth”. It depicts a tasty and equally satisfying substitute for drug addiction and an addicted swine who just can’t quite kick the habit.

The shirt is double sided and limited to only 666 pieces. It comes hand numbered with a collectible hang tag. They are $19.99 (plus shipping & handling) and come in mens sizes: Small, Medium, Large, X-large, & 2X-Large. This is a pre-order and all shirts will ship in four weeks. Artwork by the amazing Thomas Boatwright.

Click the links below to order your shirt today through Paypal.

Stay weird,
~Curtis Rx

Posted in Blog | Tagged , , , | 2 Comments

You’re Never Too Old To Punch A Bear!

In Canada, a 67-year-old man was camping deep in the Canadian north when he was confronted by a half-ton polar bear. The man, who was sleeping soundly in his tent at the time, said that the bear appeared out of nowhere and began to nudge the tent with its snout. Still wrapped in his sleeping bag, he awoke abruptly and his first reaction was to reach down for his trusty rifle, but the polar bear was already one step ahead of him and standing on the gun with its full weight. Weaponless and unprotected, the man did the only thing he could think of to defend himself, he yelled at the bear and punched it as hard as he could in its big, wet nose. The bear, who will live to see another day, took off running and the man, without a scratch on him, enjoyed the remainder of his camping trip, having defeated the beast with his own bare hands.

Posted in Weird News | Tagged , , , , | 7 Comments

French Is On The Menu Today!

In France, police raided a downtown apartment in search of a suspect in the mysterious disappearance of a famous 71-year-old french chef and discovered his body stuffed into a freezer, where it had been hidden for nearly two years by his girlfriend. Police received a tip from the girlfriend’s daughter after her mother had confided in her that something unfortunate did indeed happen to the chef, but didn’t give any specifics. When the authorities arrived on scene, the girlfriend began to sob uncontrollably and confessed her guilt by telling them “I think you’ll find what you’re looking for”. During an argument between the couple, the girlfriend spiraled into fit of rage and beat her boyfriend to death. She told authorities that once she regained her cool, she dragged the body in the bathroom for a few days until she moved it into the freezer where she hid her secret for two years.

Posted in Weird News | Tagged , , , , | 7 Comments

Feline, It’s What’s For Dinner!

In New York, Police were left with a bad taste in their mouth when they pulled over a 51-year-old man for running a stop sign and discovered a cat marinating in the trunk of his car. The man, with a taste for filet-o-feline, bathed the 4-year-old cat in olive oil and crushed peppers and then placed him in the trunk of his car, until it was ready for the flame kiss of the grill. The police heard the faint meowing of the succulent cat coming from the closed trunk and that’s when they unknowingly thwarted the man’s culinary plans. After he was taken into custody, the man told police that he had planned to cook the cat as a punishment for being ill-tempered and always causing problems. The cat was taken off the menu, cleaned up, and put up for adoption.

Posted in Weird News | Tagged , , , , | 12 Comments

This Is An Open And Shut Case!

In Brazil, an inexperienced cat burglar, who broke into a home in search of loot, was killed during his escape when the window he was crawling through slammed down and trapped him. The man entered the home under the cloak of darkness, but quickly discovered that it was abandoned and empty. After giving up his search for valuable objects, the burglar began to climb back out the same window he initially wedged open to gain entrance into the house, but it slid loose and pinned him down. The owner of the house eventually arrived to drop off a few boxes of items to store, when he discovered the body hanging halfway out of the window frame. Authorities found fingernail scratches and other strange marks on the frame surrounding the body, providing evidence that the man struggled to free himself from the death grip before asphyxiating and hanging lifeless for nearly four days.

Posted in Weird News | Tagged , , , , | 7 Comments

What Goes Up, Must Come Down!

In Turkey, a wedding turned into a senseless tragedy when a groom accidentally killed his father and two aunts with celebratory gun fire. As is tradition in Turkey for large celebrations, the groom fired an automatic weapon into the air, killing the three family members and then began to swing the gun around after he lost control of it, wounding eight other relatives in the process. Instead of cutting the cake, the groom was arrested and will spend his honeymoon in custody. Turkey has tried in the past to implement harsher punishment for the firing of weapons into the air, but even the fear of death hasn’t stopped partygoers from indulging in the illogical tradition.

Posted in Weird News | Tagged , , , , | 8 Comments

This Is Definitely Not A Good Alternative Fuel Source!

In South Carolina, a 30-year-old woman took her car into a local mechanic for a routine repair job, but noticed the car behaving strangely when she picked it back up from the shop that evening. After the car began to randomly shut off during driving, she filed a complaint with the police for negligent repair work. Another mechanic was brought in to check the automobile for evidence to back up the woman’s claims, but instead of shoddy repair work, he found an uneaten cheeseburger and a single pickle floating in the gas tank. Both the woman and mechanic haven’t the slightest clue in how the tasty meal worked its way into the gas tank and the damage it caused resulted in a $1000 bill.

Posted in Weird News | Tagged , , , , | 9 Comments

Eeny, meeny, miny, moe!

In New York, authorities have finally caught a break in a mysterious and fatal shooting case that has baffled them for months. Through a key witness’s description they have tracked down the suspected shooter, but before they can throw the book at him, they have to solve one final mystery. The witness describe the shooter with perfect clarity, unfortunately the suspect is one of two identical twin brothers and neither of them is willing to rat the other out. To further the confusion, both brothers were taken into custody and questioned, but responded with the same answers. The twins even appeared in court wearing identical clothing and matching goatees. Unable to prove which brother was the actual shooter, without a shadow of a doubt, both were tested for gun powder residue on their hands. The test came back positive for both brothers, even though there was only a single shooter at the scene. A court date is pending and witness questioning still continues in this strange case.

Posted in Weird News | Tagged , , , , | 9 Comments

Next Time Get A Second Opinion!

In Mexico, a baby born prematurely at a local hospital was declared dead immediately after her birth and the grief stricken family decided to put together a wake to mourn her passing. About halfway through the service, one of the mourners heard strange noises coming from the child’s closed coffin. The frightened man opened the coffin only to discover the baby still alive inside and crying up a storm. A parent’s worst nightmare quickly turned into a miracle and the baby was rushed to the hospital where she is currently in stable condition. The doctor who made the botched examination is currently under investigation, but stands by his initial diagnosis.

Posted in Weird News | Tagged , , , , | 12 Comments

Revenge From Beyond The Grave!

In Florida, a man was attacked by a buffalo while he slept quietly in his favorite recliner, but this particular buffalo had been decapitated and deceased for quite some time. As the man slept, a stuffed and mounted buffalo head on the wall above him broke free from its mounting and crashed down onto his lap, pinning him to the arm chair. The man’s snores quickly turned into screams as he awoke after the impact to discover that he couldn’t move his body. Eventually he was able to free his hand enough to dial 911 on his cellphone and yell out for help. Once authorities arrived on the scene, the man was rushed to the hospital and the buffalo’s spirit could finally move on knowing that he got his revenge from beyond the grave.

Posted in Weird News | Tagged , , , , | 12 Comments

Only 15 Large A STEAK TO THE HEART Shirts Left Then They’re Gone For Good!

Hello fiends,

It’s been a long time coming, but I’m pleased to announce that the first in a line of Villains And Vaudevillians t-shirts has been released and it’s called “A Steak To The Heart”. It depicts a brave, but clueless vampire hunter who, after an unfortunate misunderstanding, tries to vanquish his bloodsucking foe with a t-bone steak instead of the time-honored wooden stake.

ASteakToTheHeartBanner
A Steak To The Heart Front
A Steak To The Heart Back

The shirt is double sided and limited to only 666 pieces. It comes hand numbered with a collectible hang tag and wrapped in a butchers Styrofoam tray like any proper t-bone steak should. They are $19.99 (plus shipping & handling) and come in mens sizes: Small, Medium, Large, And X-large. All shirts will ship May 15th. Artwork by Thomas Boatwright.

I am down to less than forty shirts before they are gone for good, here’s what I have left:

Small – SOLD OUT
Medium – SOLD OUT
Large – SOLD OUT
X-Large – SOLD OUT

As a special thank you for everybody who orders this shirt and since all proceeds from the shirt will go toward the completion of my upcoming ‘Rufus Rex’ debut solo album, I will print your name in the “Thank You’ section of the album booklet. I have included a message box in the Paypal transaction link that will ask you what name you would like printed in the album.

Hope all is well,
~Curtis Rx

Posted in Blog | Tagged , , , , | 1 Comment

Night Of The Living UPDATE!

Hello fiends,

It’s been a long time since I wrote an actual blog and gave everybody an official update on what’s going on in my world, the world of Creature Feature, and my upcoming solo album. Most of you by now have heard about this ‘Rufus Rex’ album I’ve been talking about lately and I wanted to take some time to tell you a little but about it. ‘Rufus Rex’ is the name of my solo project that I’ve had for many, many years and it’s something I had always planned to bring to fruition, but just never had the time. I’ve recorded a ton of demos and played a few shows under that name, but just never had the chance to do anything with it. Anytime I would write a song that didn’t fit with the Creature Feature sound we created or any other project I was working on at the time, I would throw it in a pile, call it ‘Rufus Rex’, and there it would sit, staring at me, slowly planning my vengeful demise, until I finally succumbed to the threats on my life and decided to buckle down and record an actual album. I tend to write songs as if they are short stories, so with this album I wanted to go one step further and make it a guitar heavy, rock, concept album that tells a strange little story about archeology in the early 1900′s, the accidental awakening of slumbering evil, the quest for re-animation, madness, and the end of the world. It’s a huge story that spans over 100 years that I originally write as a film script, but decided that it would be fun to try to tell the story as an album instead (not to mention a lot cheaper), but I do have plans to turn the story into a comic book in the future and fill in all the areas of the story not touched on by the album, but first things first.

I have just a few more weeks of tweaking, sound effects, and overall obsessive tinkering until the album is finished, but in the mean time I will be releasing the first single entitled ‘Dead Air’ sometime here in the next few weeks as a free download and as a special thank you for all the people who have waited patiently for new music. The song ‘Dead Air’ is the second to last song on the album and is about the last man living in the world of the dead, constantly searching through the airwaves for any sign of life, and watching helplessly as nature reclaims the empty cities. I’m sure a lot will change in the days to come as I forge ahead on this album, but as most labors of love, blood must be shed.

Have no fear, after this album is wrapped up, Creature Feature goes back into full swing on our next album about equally ghoulish and wonderful things. All those who downloaded our new (and FREE) song ‘Grave Robber At Large’ got a taste of things to come and when we’re done, they’ll have to scrap you off the walls.

I also have a few other irons in the fire that I’m very excited about, I’ve co-written a horror anthology webseries and have just begun to shop around my recently completed full-length horror film script about discount dentistry, polished bones, and hereditary evil (although if I would have just written a re-make, it would have been filmed already). Hopefully I’ll have more news on these projects shortly as well.

I wanted to take a second to thank everybody for their ongoing support, e-mails, messages, comments, films suggestions, and for swinging by my Facebook, Twitter, Myspace, etc. I do my best to update daily and answer every post, all while trying not to spill coffee on my laptop, which I did last week and the screen now looks like it has a two-dollar spray tan.

Until we meet again,
~Curtis Rx

PS,

Ancient name whispered in the darkness
Lost words spoke from chattering teeth
Bloody runes forbode the arrival
Of a beast that no longer sleeps

Posted in Blog | Tagged , , , , , | 14 Comments

It’s Amazing What You Find Between The Cushions Of A Sofa!

In England, a cleaning service was tidying up an apartment after the previous owner was evicted and stumbled upon a withered and fully clothed corpse hiding under a sofa. After an investigation, police discovered that the body had been hidden in the apartment for nearly 10 years before its discovery. The victim’s roommate, who suffered from severe learning disabilities, came home one night and found the victim dead on the floor after a night of hard drinking. Worried that he would be evicted from his apartment because of a strict no lodgers policy, the man decided to hide the body in his sofa. Police were called to the residence multiples times to investigate complaints of a strange odor emanating from the apartment, but never discovered the body because of the piles of garbage the man had been hoarding in every corner. The man continued with his day to day routine unfazed by the corpse slowly moldering in the depths of his sofa for a decade, until he was finally evicted.

Posted in Weird News | Tagged , , , , | 17 Comments